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Gold Home > Step 5
Gold Step 5: Assembling Your "Inner Circle" Selecting your Inner Circle Engage in the selection process of your Inner Circle with care. Like with the Oscar Awards, you should start with a list of 20 to 30 people (or couples) you "nominate" for your Inner Circle. Remember that not everyone will be able to participate for various reasons. Once you’ve brainstormed to create this list, then prioritize it. Number them, low number to high number, where the low numbers are your favorite choices. Before you begin calling everyone, make notes to yourself like a bullet-pointed "script". • You’ll start out by explaining that you have decided to aggressively pursue adoption as your means to become parents…and that you’d love to "formally" ask for their help in the search process. • You can explain that you’ve selected an adoption agency and/or retained an adoption attorney, however you also want to take matters into you own hands and aggressively pursue the search for the Birthmom of your future adopted child. • So you’d love to invite them to be a member of your Inner Circle. • You will then explain what an Inner Circle is and you will include the list of responsibilities that they will be committing to.(Refer to the Silver Edition for the complete list of Inner Circle members’ responsibilities.) Asking your Inner Circle Start calling the people on the list, beginning with your favorites. Remember to ask for honesty and offer them a few days to "ponder" their decision. Be sure they know that if they can not commit at this time, that’s OK. Make sure they know that your love and friendship for each other is more important than being a part of this group. They must feel welcome to bow out if their lives are too busy to help right now. WARNING: There is a risk that some people may be disappointed, jealous or even resentful if they don’t make it into your Inner Circle. There is no good answer to this dilemma. You do not want your Inner Circle creeping up to 20 or 30 people. It will be too difficult to manage. My only advice is this. There may be the need to include one or two people (or couples) in your Inner Circle just to keep peace. And you could bump your Circle up to 12-14 pretty safely. But don’t go much bigger than that. This potential situation is one you’ll need to work out for yourself, based on the dynamics of the relationships of your family and friends. Good luck! |
